hypocrisy

this is a word that is constantly rolling around in my mind as of late, all ive ever wanted to do in this petty life of mine is give love with an open heart & open mind and all i seem to get in return are 2 faced lying hypocrites, at times like this i ask myself why all the bigotry? why even bother with people? (and humanity in general) sometimes i really wish i could just disappear.
however, i think about that one good person in my life, and for a brief second i feel a little better.

can you be that person for somebody?

paulo coelho once wrote that passion makes a person stop eating, sleeping, working, feeling at peace. a lot of people are frightened because, when it appears, it demolishes all the old things it finds in its path. no one wants their life thrown into chaos. that is why a lot of people keep that threat under control, and are somehow capable of sustaining a house or a structure that is already rotten. they are the engineers of the superseded. other people think exactly the opposite: they surrender themselves without a second thought, hoping to find in passion the solutions to all their problems. they make the other person responsible for their happiness and blame them for their possible unhappiness. they are either euphoric because something marvelous has happened or depressed because something unexpected has just ruined everything. keeping passion at bay or surrendering blindly to it which of these two attitudes is the least destructive? i dont know.

i often tell myself "from now on i do what makes me happy".
if only life were so easy..